I was 23 years old, and already a few years into a fog of doubt and confusion that was slowly suffocating me. I was not unaware of my situation, but my diagnosis was way off the mark. To be sure, I knew that I had “lost my faith,” but I didn’t understand why.
“Then with water in my eyes,
the words begin to rise from their place.
They were beautiful and dread,
I reached for them and fed on each phrase.
They were honey on my lips,
then a bitter twist in my side.
I knew they’d lay me in my grave,
‘Is there no one who could save me?’ I cried”—Words in the Water - Thrice (via philcooper)